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+--- Thread: My husband hates cats???? (/Thread-My-husband-hates-cats)
My husband hates cats???? - Meowmie - 11-02-2014
When I got married 36 years ago, I had a cat. My husband and my cat did not get along. He claimed he hated cats. The more he ignored her, the more she tried to get his attention, which was not good.
My sister adopted my cat, since I had to make a choice. He's lucky I chose him!
Fast forward 30 years, and my husband wants a Corvette. I agreed, then later realized I had blown it. I should have told him "only if I can get a cat"!
When I told him this later he was still in his Corvette high, and he said go ahead.
My Furby came to live with us, but as wonderful as she was, as a very young cat she was diagnosed with cancer and died. I was so heartbroken at the diagnosis that my husband found another cat for me. I didn't want it, just wanted Furby cured, but he kept insisting and this kitten looked so much like Furby I gave in.
Furby lived another year and a half. During that time all my attention was on her, and the new cat looked elsewhere for a meowmie. I wasn't "her human". So after Furby died, we went back to the breeder we got the second cat from and brought home a darling little kitten who doesn't leave my side. EVER.
My son decided he wanted a cat after I got Furby, so in the end, after Furby died and I got my new baby, we had three cats in the house. Then the breeder called to say she had to get out of the business and offered us the mother of both the second and third Persian's I had.
If you are still with me I'm sure at this point you are wondering what this has to do with my husband hating cats. The momma cat decided that my husband was her human. She wore him down!
Unfortunately, she, along with my son's cat, died this past year. It was hard on all of us, but the loss of the cat that chose him as her human hit him hard. It has been nearly a year since we buried her with her (with his slippers that she loved) and he still hasn't gotten over it.
As much as I missed those cats, I was rather happy to only be buying food and litter for 2 cats vs 4, and not spending most of my time emptying litter boxes and having vet bills that even when there was nothing but normal check ups, I had to call what they handed me "williams" because they were to big to be called "bills.
I received an email from my husband a few days ago. It was a link to a Persian rescue center. Without talking to me, he had filled out an application for one of the cats! I wasn't really ready for this. The litter, the food, the grooming, the vet bills, what will we do when we make our big move in 2 years and will have to rent for awhile?
But, of course, I do not hate cats so I am now anxiously waiting to hear if we will be new parents, and in my amazon cart are a new litter box and more food and litter.
The only people that really hate cats are those that haven't had them in their lives! Cats really do leave paw prints on your heart.
RE: My husband hates cats???? - kfander - 11-02-2014
When I was married, for the first and only time, in 2000, I had three cats in the house and a feral cat that I had raised and was feeding outdoors. I won't say that my wife hated cats but she hadn't had one and hadn't come to realize how much a part of the family they can be. My kitty, Lydia (who, approaching 25, is quite feeble these days), didn't make things any better. She hated my wife and, in the first year that we were married, she crapped in her shoes a couple of times, in her purse once, and another time on the couch where she had been sitting. She was already ten years old, and had been with me since birth (my other two cats were her mother and twin sister), so I don't know what I would have done if I had to make a choice. Eventually, and only after a great deal of relearning how to deal with a troubled cat, we were able to bring things around to something that was more livable. Although we've been married for nearly fifteen years now, Lydia still hisses at my wife if she walks into a room too abruptly, although she no longer craps in her stuff, and has even chosen a cat bed near my wife's desk from time to time.
Her sister, Cutie, wasn't too crazy about the changes in her life either, but she would never dream of doing anything as gross as crapping anywhere outside of the litter box. In fact, she was once accidentally locked into a walk-in closet while we were away for a day and a half; when we returned, she was yelling to be let out, and made a dash to the litter box. She had left no messes in the closet. She wasn't overly fond of my new wife either, but she took a passive-aggressive approach. She would get between us if we were sitting on the couch, or lying in bed, and then push on my wife, trying to get her to move further away. Baby Girl, their mom (who died of cancer at 23 years of age), welcomed my wife without reservation. Of course, she also tried to carry her ten-year-old kittens around the house, so her faculties were, I suppose, suspect.
Eventually, Lydia began to realize that she wasn't going to be able to get rid of my wife, and Cutie decided she could live with the situation if she had to, but neither of them ever really warmed up to her. We took the formerly feral cat (Bird) in to the house, and she liked my wife well enough, but she was never an overly affectionate cat since she never completely lost all of her feral attributes.
When we decided to take Bird in, we didn't know that she was pregnant. She had four beautiful kittens, one of which we kept. Actually, we had adopted her (Obadiah) out, but she was returned when the family we adopted her to moved to a place that didn't accept cats. Obadiah had a big thing about being fair. She would literally spend a certain amount of time on my lap, then move over to my wife to give her allotted time. Obadiah was the first cat that my wife ever had that would allow her to experience what having a cat is all about. Unfortunately, we lost her to (probably) a fox a couple of summers ago, when she was twelve.
With their mom, Bird, and Obadiah gone, Cutie and Lydia were just lying around in their beds all day as if there was nothing to get up for. We decided to adopt a kitten, who is now almost a year old. When Ella came to live with us, both Cutie and Lydia hated her. True to her personality, Lydia still hates her, except that I have caught them cleaning one another a couple of times. Cutie and Ella have become fast friends and playmates.
To the topic though, Ella became my wife's cat. Although she likes me well enough, and turns to me when she want to play, she spends most of her time in my wife's office, near her desk, and my wife has, through Obadiah and Ella, come to love cats. But not Lydia; but that's okay - the feeling's mutual.
RE: My husband hates cats???? - Meowmie - 11-02-2014
What a wonderful story, I enjoyed reading it. I didn't mention it in my post but the thing my first cat did to get my husbands attention was pee on his chair. I think if he had petted her and talked nice to her, she would have been happy and the problem would be solved but they were both stubborn.
Giving her up was hard but since my sister was happy to take her and until I got married they lived in the same house, it was more like she was just going "home", but without me.
Cat sure do have a way of winning people over, but I can see why your wife isn't fond of Lydia!
The idea of a momma trying to carry her 10 year old children around made me LOL. What a sight that must have been!
RE: My husband hates cats???? - BobCat - 04-07-2015
Enjoyed reading these stories!
My husband does not hate cats. The problem is that he was out of town for several months, when we got one of our cats, Eddie. To complicate matters, he goes out of town on a regular basis. Unfortunately, our Eddie is a handful and not too receptive to visitors in the house. She considers my husband a visitor. lol
It is the same ole routine, she will hide for a couple days. Then she will perch on the stairway ledge and hiss at my husband whenever he passes by. He will then try to tease her playfully and out come the claws. I tell him to have a more gentle disposition towards her, but the two of them, just have not connected. I mean, they almost get to a level of acceptance right before he has to leave again. It seems like a vicious cycle.
On the other hand, our older cat Herman, knows my husband better. It helps that she has a more outgoing personality. She gets so happy to see him because she knows when he cooks, she gets a treat! He spoils her rotten!
RE: My husband hates cats???? - Natalie89 - 06-28-2015
What a great story!
When I was younger my mum hated any pets so it wasn't until I moved out aged 18 that I got my first cat, a rescue, aged 14. He was absolutely bonkers and my mum refused to come round my house as she disliked him so much. Sadly he passed away shortly after I homed him and she said it was 'for the best'.
I waited a little while and got a sweet little lady called Molly; she was far more relaxed than my first cat, but again mum wouldn't warm to her, when she visited she always said I had to put the cat out of the way before she would come into the house. Molly got hit by a lorry that was reversing down my road (it's a one way street that he shouldn't have been down in the first place!) and again mum couldn't understand the sadness, despite her only being about 10 months old
Not to be deterred, having loved my kitty company, I bought another kitten who, strangely, refused to go outside. She wouldn't budge, but at least I didn't have to worry about her getting squashed.
About a year after I got her I found out I was pregnant- she followed me around constantly and as the pregnancy went on, and mum visiting more often, I found that she gravitated towards mum as her 'human' almost as if she knew I wasn't going to be able to be full time mum to her. At first my mum was hesitant, but as time went by she'd stroke her, then bring her treats when she visited, and soon they were inseparable every visit! It was definitely Dusty pushing herself on mum though that made that change.
An unfortunate turn of events meant my baby really came early, and after much stress and upset I came to decide I would have to rehome Dusty and approached a lady at work. The day came for her to go and my mum arrives to 'say goodbye' only to tell my colleague there was a change of plan and she wanted to take her home!
So now Dusty is definitely mums cat, she didn't only win her around, she made her into a cat person!
RE: My husband hates cats???? - Shihtzufan - 06-29-2015
I agree 100% with you that those that say they hate cats simply haven't had the joy of having one in their lives.
My dad wasn't a cat fan at all. I never had a pet growing up, but when I got married my husband already had a pet cat - so I was super excited but my dad wasn't so much. It's funny because as adamant as he was that he hated cats, Casey has really grown on him. I wouldn't go as far as to say he LOVES him (and actually, my dad gets pretty bad allergies around him!) but he says "he's pretty great for a cat" which is as close to him admitting he loves him as I could expect, hah!
I think cats are wonderful affectionate creatures and I do honestly believe they do their best to try and win over the people that say they dislike cats!
RE: My husband hates cats???? - niightwind - 07-03-2015
Unless someone has allergies, I really can't understand why someone wouldn't like cats! I met someone once who was horrified by cats, especially kittens. She said there wasn't anything specifically wrong with them but she hated how they felt; to her it was like holding a bag of bones, somehow. Very strange in my opinion. I'm fortunate that everyone in my immediate family + my boyfriend all love animals, cats included. That's both sad and adorable how the cat took a liking to your husband and made him her person. A sad end, but one all pet owners face; at least he got a chance to experience the joy of having a kitty in his life.
The start of the experience reminded me of a post I saw somewhere else one time; tumblr I think it was. Can't remember the exact words but it was along the lines of;;
"Got a new cat, but my boyfriend doesn't like him, so need to find him a new home. He's ginger and answers to the name of Tom. 34 years old."
It was hilarious, referring to her boyfriend as the joke instead of the cat.
The post itself was a lot funnier then what I can explain on my own though.
RE: My husband hates cats???? - remnant - 08-06-2016
Why should someone have cats? I think it would be good for the person to be quizzed because it could be as a result of a negative encounter when they were young and the attitude was consigned to the recesses of the subconscious. We all have our idiosyncracies but we should be rational when it comes to handling animals because they are innocent souls and whatever unpleasant aspect that they have is instinctive not calculated. I have observed that type A personalities who are typically hostile (not in the real sense), and lead a fast paced life can apply this to their pets. My mother belongs to this category and doesn't suffer animals pestering her especially dogs when she is carrying out her daily chores. I have also found that a conscious effort to overcome a negative attitude can work. This however has to begin with someone acknowledging that they have an attitude problem which is not easy because most people don't like to address reality. There is an interesting dichotomy in the fact that some children hate pets from other homes but show affection to those in their homes. I personally don't hate cats because they are quite independent and they tend to keep their personal space and are manifestly hygienic. In fact, its hard to find cat poop, they have a way of concealing the same keeping the compound clean. They can also be seen grooming each other regularly and they don't seem to have issues with most parasites because of this which reduces chances of transmission of zoonosis. The only issue I have is the tendency of their fur to freckle and get into the nose when one is playing with them which might cause allergies or respiratory ailments over a prolonged period of exposure.
RE: My husband hates cats???? - rz3300 - 08-23-2016
Well I am sorry to hear about your losses and all of that, but it seems like you have a pretty good support system (including other cats) that is there to help you get through it all, which of course is a great thing. I am facing a similar situation right now, and I cannot understand how so many people out there do not like cats, and some of the time actively dislike them. It just does not make sense to me, at all, and I know that it has to do with me growing up with them, but still. I guess I understand if you are allergic to them, but aside from that I am at a loss. I guess you really have to weigh your priorities in life, and sometimes that means making some difficult decisions. Best of luck to you in the future, and thank you for sharing.
RE: My husband hates cats???? - HemmyngsKylee - 02-19-2021
It's an old thread, but I want to answer it. I had a boyfriend who didn't like cats and pets, so now he is an ex-boyfriend.